[susie_bubble]

^Wow... I think you know very well the worth of your originality or both you and Soft are very much aware of the surrounding reaction.

I don't get that at all........... I don't feel all that original or stand-out especially in a place like London......... I mean, fashionable people are everywhere. Nobody really gawps all that much. What I'm saying is, I don't illicit jealousy/intimidation in people because of the way I dress.

[i_<3_chanel]

i'd say i'm just aware . . . i'm also very much aware that i'm not original
no-one really is. we all subconsciously feed off other people & claiming that you don't is silly!
it was more in response to soft's comment about attention & jealousy
but i don't really know why i get that reaction from girls in particular?
i know it's not so much to do with the way i dress, my 'style' is nothing special. more likely my attitude.
plus i don't live in london, which like you said is swarming with stylish people. ;]

[gius]

it might not just be fashion
originality could fit to behaviour or outlook...
things like that

like it's easy to stand out if you're an introvert

[softgrey]

well susise...
i think it says more about other peoples' insecurities than anything else, when they are jealous of the attention another person receives...for whatever reason...

and i think that the field that i am in means that people are HYPER aware of what people are wearing...
especially other people who work in fashion...
but even people who don't ...
often people assume certain things when they learn someone is in the fashion industry...
either that they are shallow or that they are going to pass judgement about what others are wearing...

this can make people either condescend or become defensive...
and then they tend to lash out...
with no provocation at all really....

i get this regularly actually...

*and no matter what i wear .... or do...
i ALWAYS seem to stand out in the crowd...(both professionally and personally)
which can be quite awkward if you are quite shy...(and i am)
or if it is someone else's special event...etc...
...

*there are always a few 'haters' in every crowd, no?

[susie_bubble]

^I see what you mean........ I can see how that happens a lot especially in the field you work in.

I guess, I'm the kind of person who's not really all that aware of these things. I may or may not get postive/negative reactions but it just kind of swooshes over my head. I'm also the kind of person who just sort of bumbles along, oblivious to bitchy behaviour........ in that way my friends always day I'm very naive...... I'm awful at dealing with office politics because I'd rather not acknowledge that bitchiness happens at all!

[softgrey]

yeah well...
i would say i am the opposite actually...
i am VERY sensitive...
i sense every dirty look and roll of the eyes and little dig...
i think my sensitivity serves me well creatively...but hurts in many other way...



my friend is like you susie...
i think you're very fortunate...
i have to try really hard not to let other peoples' bad attitudes get me down..

[i_<3_chanel]

susie i'm sure you do engage other people's attention . . but like you said . . you are probably unaware!
& it's funny you say you're oblivious . . i am very much too
until other people start to point these things out to me & tell me their 'opinions'
which sets me off . . being conscious . . & noticing things . . . .

[newprincesita]

ALSO- i wish people didn't get so jealous
i usually get a bit of attention due to the way i dress-no big deal...i;m just used to it now, and yes- it is nice when someone says something nice...
so i do like it-of course!...

BUT---
it sometimes feels like the other women in the surroundings are jealous of that attention..
and then aren't so friendly towards me...sometimes kind of nasty even..
which is rather unpleasant, you know?...and really unecessary...IMHO...

*AGH...crazy insecurities that people have...
...[/quote]



Yes, I strongly agree. It´s like they said "Don´t stand out, just be like everybody else. I don´t like the attention you get, so just be normal, like me"

I think apreciation is nice because it meets the effort you make, and it´s a way of "giving" something of you out. When people compliment, they say "Thanks for letting me see this new form of individual beauty"
If that kind of recognition, open-mindness and grace raises bad feelings in other people, well...too bad for them. Because they don´t want to discover and appreciate new beauty, but they want everybody to conform to the "normal" which is often, boring.

[Meg]

When I get looks off people, or girls, I never really get jealousy vibes off them (prob. because they aren't jealous!) more just like 'what the eff is that girl wearing'.

Susie, i def. think you do stand out, even in a place like London. I'm sure, even without seeing your face, i would recognize you on the street based on your style. I think true style in london is as hard to come by as anywhere else. The highstreet in the UK makes it easier, but topshop and new look (insert whatever highstreet chain you wish) are the same as A&F and Hollister, AE, what have you, they just sell trendier clothes as oppose to 'vintage' tees and khaki's. It's the same deal really as anywhere else.

[Angie C]

I often try to remind myself of the rule that if you ask most people to choose between two things, one they are familiar with and one that they haven't seen before they will most likely choose the thing that feels familiar. That is how most people work. Trying to understand what is "well known" to a group of people and what you are doing that provokes them so makes it easier to take critic. Just thinking that you are some sort of higher breed than them makes noone happy.

I also feel there is a huge difference if you are surrounded by some sort of "community" than if you are completely on your own. Just the knowledge that you have people behind you who appreciate how you dress makes you less vulnerable. This used to mean it was harder to come from a small town, and that more people express themselves in big cities. But today originality lives in a privileged time, because of internet, broader distribution of magazines, etc, wherever you are you can find people who share your interest, TFS is an exellent example, people encourage each other and share ideas... it makes you stronger!

But at the same time, and because of that, I start to wonder if there really is any true originality left. So quickly I see the most avant-garde ideas becomes "something" and the minute it becomes "something" outlines and rules are drawn on how to wear it and it starts to become just another juicy couture-tracksuit with uggs. What is referred to as "personal style" which in 99% of the cases is the not-so-shocking-anymore formula of some designer, some vintage, a dash of highstreet, has almost become a genre in itself. And I always get insanely provocated by subcultures that are supposed to be about uniqueness but then have the hardest rules of what is approved and not, all look like clones and then they DARE say that normal people don't think for themselves. I think that proves that most people desperately DO want to fit in... it's just WHERE you want to fit in that makes a difference.

[softgrey]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Meg Susie, i def. think you do stand out, even in a place like London.

ditto...
how can one NOT notice a person with pom poms tied around their head???...



come on....

[susie_bubble]

^ ok....maybe a little
but I swear there are TONS of outlandishly dressed ppl here............ it's really like a competition to outdo each other on outrageous-ness or something....

Angie...you articulated everything so well... I do feel that what we would call original, the mix as you talked about has become rather generic which isn't to say it's a bad thing but that it's kind of difficult to label something truly original.

[melt977]

Quote:

Originally Posted by susie_bubble ^Wow... I think you know very well the worth of your originality or both you and Soft are very much aware of the surrounding reaction. I don't get that at all........... I don't feel all that original or stand-out especially in a place like London......... I mean, fashionable people are everywhere. Nobody really gawps all that much. What I'm saying is, I don't illicit jealousy/intimidation in people because of the way I dress.

Can't karma you again for another sane answer susie...

[softgrey]

angie...great post......

i couldn't agree more...
...

tFS does help give each of us the support of a community...
and we DO all want to fit in on some level...it's just a matter of where...

i think susie's 'oblivious' thing might really just be a certain level of comfort with herself...

i do think that if you really OWN something...people aren't as afraid if they don't understand it...
it's up to you-the individual-to put the others at ease to a certain extent...
which goes back to what chanel said ...

it's a lot of work!!......

[golucky]

Excellent post! I don't feel I have much to add because I agree with most everything that's been said ... however, re: the whole jealousy thing, I have a friend who I love dearly but who seems to try to "compete" with me fashion-wise. She's always complimenting my clothes and overall style, asking me where I got things and whatnot, and then a few weeks later she'll turn up in the same thing or a very very similar style.

Now, I hate it when people claim to originate their styles because ... even though I certainly try to be very creative and "original" with my outfits, I know that I'm influenced by many different factors ... and that includes many pages of this site, too! But, ummm, when your friend goes out and buys exactly what you were wearing or never even considered a certain style but becomes obsessed with it once you've taken the initiative and worn it (with compliments from other people ... and I don't mean that to sound prideful or anything at all) ... well ... then it gets annoying.

I'm an artsy person in general (but un-sports-coordinated, so it totally evens out) so I genuinely enjoy expressing myself through fashion ... mostly from thrift stores, pieces from cheapie stores like Target or Forever 21 or whatever, and even a few DIY things I've sewn myself. (speaking of originality, if you haven't already, all of you should check out this site for some ideas!) But ... I have to admit that I get annoyed when people directly copy me, even if it is flattering. It's understandable for people to wear similar styles or have similar ideas, but ... yeah. Sorry, now I'm just ranting, I guess.

Anyways. It's gotten to the point where I don't want to talk to her about fashion ideas or what I'm working on (like t-shirts I'm cutting up/designing/whatever) because I'm afraid she'll do the same thing and we'll be the same ... when my whole goal is to be different and stand out. Alas.