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30-05-2009
  76
Meg
inspired contemplation
 
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I agree dumbfairy re: family. I am a firm believer that when I want to be with family it is because I think they are great people and I love them, not simply because they are "family". To be fair, this is pretty easy to accomplish since I'm an only child But I do have negative people in my family, and I just reduce the amount I speak with them and try not to take them too seriously.

Regarding negative thoughts, yes I totally agree that one has to be conscious of not letting someone else dominate their thoughts but likewise, I am always wary of these lines of thinking that focus on control within oneself. Because it can easily warp to, you are not in control if you let someone who has hurt you dominate your thoughts. And this in turn makes you feel worse about yourself for not be able to dominate your own thoughts. I don't disagree with the principle, and have said it to my friends on different occasions, but I just think it's a fine line.

Having an awesome laugh is the best way to feel good about oneself. And getting back to CLOTHING :p definitely wearing your favorite items. There's no better way to feel good than wearing your favorite jeans, or a top you think looks great

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01-06-2009
  77
scenester
 
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Simply for me: don't try clothes on after eating a huge meal because my stomach is full of food and it shows

Otherwise I love my body/myself/the chance to be on this earth lol

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05-06-2009
  78
flaunt the imperfection
 
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have we mentioned getting enough sleep/rest???...

SO important!!!...
i am SUCH a grouch when i don't sleep well......


which leads me back to the original thought...
thinking happy thoughts and smiling does wonders...


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05-06-2009
  79
Power to the 99%
 
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Location: Hardly ever at Barney's
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Meg View Post
I agree dumbfairy re: family. I am a firm believer that when I want to be with family it is because I think they are great people and I love them, not simply because they are "family". To be fair, this is pretty easy to accomplish since I'm an only child But I do have negative people in my family, and I just reduce the amount I speak with them and try not to take them too seriously.

Regarding negative thoughts, yes I totally agree that one has to be conscious of not letting someone else dominate their thoughts but likewise, I am always wary of these lines of thinking that focus on control within oneself. Because it can easily warp to, you are not in control if you let someone who has hurt you dominate your thoughts. And this in turn makes you feel worse about yourself for not be able to dominate your own thoughts. I don't disagree with the principle, and have said it to my friends on different occasions, but I just think it's a fine line.

Having an awesome laugh is the best way to feel good about oneself. And getting back to CLOTHING :p definitely wearing your favorite items. There's no better way to feel good than wearing your favorite jeans, or a top you think looks great
I agree that there's no point in feeling bad about yourself ... and admittedly taking control of your thoughts and emotions is an advanced skill. But to me it so enhances your personal power to realize you actually do have control of these things. That it's up to you whether you have a good or a bad day. That no one else has the prerogative to put you (as someone once told me had been done to her, with what seemed a rather self-righteous victimy air) 'in spiritual ICU.' Being a victim can be addictive and seductive, but refusing to be a victim is the ultimate power.

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06-06-2009
  80
trendsetter
 
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Before I go to bed I write sometimes - about things I need to get done, things I want to achieve, things I need to build on or lack.

I also keep track of my shopping so that am not over the top consumerist! It makes me sick to think that am one of those people who amass things endlessly I'm trying to follow the 4-5 piece French wardrobe rule. Only buying a few quality key pieces ever season. That way what I buy is something I really want.

As I have flexi-hours and can do my work from home - I work late into the night and wake up at odd hours.

I like watching gossip girl and skipping/ fast walking on the tread mill.

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06-06-2009
  81
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Quote:
Originally Posted by softgrey View Post
have we mentioned getting enough sleep/rest???...

SO important!!!...
i am SUCH a grouch when i don't sleep well......
Very true. I have some sleeping issues that come and go, and I really don't appreciate my sleep enough. Until I can't sleep

It's all about taking care of yourself. Eating healthy, sleeping enough, laughing, doing the things you love to do, ect.

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18-08-2009
  82
flaunt the imperfection
 
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i got an ipod...

* i know...i know...
i am really late to the party on this one...


but it's good to have music to 'keep me company' as i run errands and such...
it definitely helps my mood and i walk with more of a spring in my step when i am listening to a happy song...

or it keeps me calm to listen to thelonius monk while i am waiting for a train that is taking way too long in the sweltering heat...

:p

music hath charms to soothe the savage beast...

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18-08-2009
  83
front row
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
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This is a great thread!

I have a few things that i do religiously that help me through the day, to make me feel calmer and clear my thoughts;

First thing when I wake up, and before I go to bed I have a cup of hot water w freshly squeezed lemon or lime juice. I always eat a banana first thing too.

I do about 30 minutes of stretches before I have a shower, along with exercises during the day so I am not too inactive.

I listen to music and sing (and dance too when I am alone) it really helps me.

I write letters, to my boyfriend or best friend just to get thoughts out of my head and onto paper to make them clearer, although I don't send the letters

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21-08-2009
  84
Power to the 99%
 
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I came across this today ... you've probably heard that there are only two basic motivations, love and fear, and everything's better when you're acting out of love ... but this little comparison from Martha Beck's column in O really spells it out better than anything I've ever seen ... an easy way to tell the difference.

Quote:
FEAR
Always feels bad
Motivates grasping
Seizes control
Insists on certainty
Needs everything

LOVE
Always feels good
Motivates liberation
Relaxes control
Accepts uncertainty
Needs nothing

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Last edited by fashionista-ta; 21-08-2009 at 12:58 PM.
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29-08-2009
  85
flaunt the imperfection
 
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so-

i have found an excercise program that works for me..
and i am shocked...SHOCKED...i tell you...
i cannot believe how much better i look and feel...
not just physically...but mentally as well...

as my body gets stronger..my mind is getting stronger as well...
and my confidence level has increased tremendously...
i just FEEL stronger and better...

this is great!
i could kick myself for not doing it sooner!!!...
...

all those people telling you that exercise is the most important thing are SO completely right!

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Last edited by softgrey; 29-08-2009 at 12:11 PM.
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29-08-2009
  86
trendsetter
 
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really sounds great, softgrey what kind of exercise program is it which makes you so happy and feeling better about everything?

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29-08-2009
  87
front row
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by softgrey View Post
all those people telling you that exercise is the most important thing are SO completely right!
So true, I know whenever I fail to go to the gym for whatever reason I feel so... frumpy. Just a week ago I was on a trip to Boston with my family and I ate an incredible amount of bake goods. Seriously, I gotta stay away from Dunkin' Donuts and Starbucks next time I'm in the States Unfortunately it's showing on my face, I'm all broken out from the sugar and not enough of drinking water over than juice and pop. Bahh, just when my face was clearing up too and school starts next week for me

Anyhow, Monday I'm back at the gym, the sweat and exercise should help out some, think I could use a bit of a wake up from post vacation eating habits and overall laziness.

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30-08-2009
  88
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
 
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softie... what is this miracle workout?!

I have never felt more beautiful than when my daughter is in bed with me and stroking my hair and my face and I can hear her breathing in the dark. I honestly believe that love, and the connections we make with people really make us who we are. And the relationship I have with my daughter is so beautiful - which makes me feel beautiful in turn...

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30-08-2009
  89
Riot Bug
 
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i usually like to listen music that makes my mood going up... and try things... i tend to throw clothes away if i don't have an straight idea of the outfit itself haha... sometimes i do stick into the same song and i go here and there singing it...
the thing is you feeling right on your skin depends on your mood... and what are you gonna do... usually when i picked up a temporary depressing job i used to dress depressing hahaha... which made it more depressing...

i think the way you wear and how comfortable do you feel on what you are wearing it... makes a lot difference in how do you move, act or even take decisions... and i don't want to make like a big deal of dressing up but even being a big time refuser of the coolness.. i don't mean that of wear cooool...i mean whatever you wear feel yourself and not like you are putting some other peoples clothes... or some clothes of a person that you don't really wanna be... I hope it didnt turn into a rant too cryptic

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31-08-2009
  90
Power to the 99%
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Belowen View Post
I have never felt more beautiful than when my daughter is in bed with me and stroking my hair and my face and I can hear her breathing in the dark. I honestly believe that love, and the connections we make with people really make us who we are. And the relationship I have with my daughter is so beautiful - which makes me feel beautiful in turn...
I love that

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