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19-03-2008
  16
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Energy and vitality--not to mention a sparkle in the eye.

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19-03-2008
  17
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I think it is a number of things but IMO always starts with self confidence.

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19-03-2008
  18
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Quote:
Originally Posted by brokenenglish View Post
I think it is a number of things but IMO always starts with self confidence.
i agree with this, ultimately, it is the person inside who defines how we see them. but i would qualify the self confidence to say that it is a type of confidence that is not overly arrogant, but self-assured. someone who knows who they are, accepts their strengths and weaknesses, but has the impetus to really accentuate their gifts and take advantage of these - that is a great self-actualization that is rare these days.

i think the other component to this is the ability to perceive, interact, and fully engage those around you. this of course doesn't necessarily mean through verbal speaking or direct contact - this is a social intelligence to be able to have the right body movements when you interact with those around you, being able to speak clearly and articulately, giving proper eye contact... for those of us new to a social situation, or as a casual observer - we will make slight judgments initially off of these visual cues.

what i have not mentioned, but is implicit, is that a person who knows herself well will also be in tune to proper dress, proportions, grooming, colours, etc. a captivating person can engage people visually, orally, and physically simultaneously. beauty is not skin deep, it exists on several planes.

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19-03-2008
  19
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Caring about other people + not caring what other people think of you + having a skill = awesomeness

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20-03-2008
  20
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Besides the outward stuff like eyes, smile and overall appearance, I think that distance, or a certain sense of mystery makes a person captivating. It makes you want to know more about them, break through the outer walls so to speak.

But I think there has to be some fire behind it, and that's where a person's eyes come in, they let you know if there's something beyond the exterior.

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Last edited by Spike413; 20-03-2008 at 02:36 AM.
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17-04-2008
  21
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bump!

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18-04-2008
  22
windowshopping
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by picnmix View Post
I think it has a lot to do with inner confidence. People who are captivating carry themselves well, they have good posture, and they comfortable with themselves. I think being comfortable means that you can look a bit different, but you don't have to.
exactly! You can read someone so easily by how they feel about themself. So often I think, "I can't pull that off". But I bet I could if I felt more comfortable about myself.

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18-04-2008
  23
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When they completely recontextualize time & space with their presence.

I'm serious! Suddenly, the moment - and the whole world - is theirs & you're just witnessing it.

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18-04-2008
  24
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Quote:
Originally Posted by shirleebee View Post
When they completely recontextualize time & space with their presence.

I'm serious! Suddenly, the moment - and the whole world - is theirs & you're just witnessing it.

I absolutely agree with you! It's like seeing a person alone at a crowded party and watching how the world revolves around them and they have done NOTHING but stand there. That is total and complete swagger.

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18-04-2008
  25
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Spike413 View Post
I think that distance, or a certain sense of mystery makes a person captivating. It makes you want to know more about them, break through the outer walls so to speak.

But I think there has to be some fire behind it, and that's where a person's eyes come in, they let you know if there's something beyond the exterior.
Definately about the mystery or distance - its intriguing, although can also be frustrating at times! And I also agree about the eyes, "windows to the soul" is a cliche, but its a true one. Self confidence is also key, as this effects posture which is very important. When I say self confidence, I don't mean cockeyness (sp?), but rather being comfortable enough in their own skin and to not see other people as a threat to be "brought down".

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24-04-2008
  26
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Quote:
Originally Posted by chanelnumber5 View Post
Definately about the mystery or distance - its intriguing, although can also be frustrating at times! And I also agree about the eyes, "windows to the soul" is a cliche, but its a true one. Self confidence is also key, as this effects posture which is very important. When I say self confidence, I don't mean cockeyness (sp?), but rather being comfortable enough in their own skin and to not see other people as a threat to be "brought down".
i kind of find more of an appeal in vulnerability than confidence

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24-04-2008
  27
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Quote:
Originally Posted by chanelnumber5 View Post
Definately about the mystery or distance - its intriguing, although can also be frustrating at times! And I also agree about the eyes, "windows to the soul" is a cliche, but its a true one. Self confidence is also key, as this effects posture which is very important. When I say self confidence, I don't mean cockeyness (sp?), but rather being comfortable enough in their own skin and to not see other people as a threat to be "brought down".
I agree with your definition of confidence, and that's important to me too ... basically you're talking about a baseline of maturity. Life is too short to deal with people who don't have it, unless you absolutely must ...

But I do know people who have this + bad posture

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29-04-2008
  28
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I think sometimes it has to do with a kind of 'purity' - some quality in them whereby they haven't been tainted by the world around them. People like Audrey Hepburn had this, and to a lesser extent, Grace Kelly..... I think right now Natalia Vodyanova has it too. They seem cleaner than everyone else.... at once simpler and more sophisticated. You know that if you wiped every last trace of make up off their faces, the same quality would shine out, even if they had an enormous zit right on the end of their noses. I went to college with a girl like that once. Even with an enormous zit on the end of her nose, she still had that elegant purity about her.

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29-04-2008
  29
Power to the 99%
 
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^ This is definitely what I need to aim for as I'm sure with my luck it will happen to me again

Lately I have been wondering if the most captivating models aren't old souls, and that's why we can't stop looking into their eyes ...

Gemma Ward is another good example of what you're talking about.

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29-04-2008
  30
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Yep... while I think Jessica Stam is exactly the opposite, she's beautiful but there is something kinda... decadent in the most literal sense about her beauty.

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