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11-06-2010
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Renee Zellweger and Bradley Cooper getting married? *Update* Split


Squinty Zellweger not only resembles a lemon-sucking blonde version of Liza Minnelli, but apparently she's got the same thirst for (allegedly) gay husbands. See Kenny Chesney.

Page Six seems to think that Squinty is planning on marrying her Bradley Cooper, because she went wedding dress shopping at Carolina Herrera in West Hollywood last week. A witness type said that she looked at dresses for nearly two hours, and coyly smiled whenever someone asked her if she was getting hitched. Squints left with a garment bag in hand.

Squints is going for some kind of professional fag hag record! Maybe she actually likes spending her wedding night nibbling on a piece of cake in the corner of her suite while listening to her new husband sloppily eating another dude's as* in the next room? Or maybe she just likes weddings. And the best way to party at a wedding is to do it next to a gay!

While a straight man might roll his eyes or let out a mouth fart when they release the white doves into the sky, a gay's heart will flutters right next to yours. And while a straight dude might not give a fuc* what you look like during the reception as long your as* puts out that night, a gay will make sure you look like elegant perfection from top to bottom at all times! So I get it, Squints. I get it.

Here's B.Coop and his Pledge-scented beard going to lunch with their parents in NYC yesterday.
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Last edited by Kenysha75; 11-06-2010 at 06:52 AM.
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11-06-2010
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I just think Bradley Cooper could do so much better than Renee Zellweger. Eww.

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11-06-2010
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^AMEN

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11-06-2010
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In before another *annulement*

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11-06-2010
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KateIsGr8 View Post
I just think Bradley Cooper could do so much better than Renee Zellweger. Eww.
I agree

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11-06-2010
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Bradley Cooper is gay? Huh?

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12-06-2010
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^ no, allegedly kenny chesney is gay. bradley is blind.

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14-06-2010
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lunabella View Post
^ no, allegedly kenny chesney is gay. bradley is blind.
Hit the nail on the head.

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18-03-2011
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Renee Zellweger & Bradley Cooper Split

Bradley Cooper and Renee Zellweger have ended their relationship after being together less than two years, according to Us Weekly.

Bradley, 36, and Zellweger, 41, first met on the set of Case 39 but didnít get together until 2009.

PHOTOS: Renee Zellweger and Bradley Cooper checking on home renovations

Renee was recently named as the new face for Tommy Hilfigerís charity campaign. Bradley currently stars in the new thriller Limitless hitting theaters today.
justjared

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18-03-2011
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Squinty And B.Coop Broke Up

This is turning out to be the worst week ever for contract couples beards love! Cherub's wings already wilted once when Ashley Greene and Joe Jonas announced their split and now comes the news that Renee Zellweger no longer has the squints for Bradley Cooper. If John Travolta and Kelly Preston announce their divorce this weekend, then it's pretty clear that the ancient art of bearding is on its way into the casket.

A source (aka the intern in Bradley Cooper's publicist's office) tell People that after 2 years together, B.Coop and the test tube baby of Tinkerbell and Lemonhead have moved on to different genitals. This comes after Star Magazine claimed that B.Coop was possibly passing his peen to Jessica Biel and Sandra Bullock. Poor Squinty's probably squinting, puckering and crying so hard that her face turned inside/out. It's going to be like that all weekend, I'm sure. Damn, B.Coop!

Spokeswhores for B.Coop and Squinty pursed their lips and closed their eyes when People asked for a comment.

I used up all my cynical "fake as* relationship" jokes on Joe Jonas and Ashley Greene this week, so I'll simply end this post by saying: GO SEE BRADLEY COOPER'S MOVIE LIMITLESS WHICH HAPPENS TO COME OUT TODAY!
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Last edited by Kenysha75; 18-03-2011 at 09:09 PM.
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18-03-2011
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They were a perfect couple to me. Sad

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18-03-2011
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awww... i loved them together!

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18-03-2011
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What a waste of time ... when will these people stop lying.

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19-03-2011
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I love all the star break ups. Means there is chance for me yet! Maybe not with Renee per se, but who knows, I'm really open to things. Call me...

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19-03-2011
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Well that sucks! I really liked them as a couple.

I guess this completes the triplet of splits: Jessica/Justin, Ashlee/Joe, Renee/Bradley.
It always happens in threes. The same goes with deaths.

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