moussemaker
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report from "Access Hollywood"
The new issue of Vanity Fair hits newsstands on April 12 with the lovely ladies of Wisteria Lane gracing the cover in their swimsuits.
But after reading the article, some would say "Swimming with Sharks" might be a better title than "Desperate Housewives."
Although Marcia Cross sure had a different take on things.
"It was fun, oh my God!" Cross told Access. "It was just like fantasy day, you know."
A "fantasy" photo shoot? Not according to Vanity Fair contributing editor Ned Zeman.
"Each hour was just getting worse and worse and worse as the clock was ticking," Zeman revealed. "I don't think that there is any denying that it was a disaster."
Eva, Felicity, Marcia, Nicolette and Teri – a cover shoot that apparently went from bad to much, much worse.
Of course, a tight shoot schedule didn't help matters – as they tried to cram what would normally take two days into just 25 minutes.
"I never thought we'd wind up in bathing suits, but there you go," Marcia Cross joked with us.
Early on, despite the circus-like atmosphere where each lady had her own hair, makeup and wardrobe team, plus a personal handler, everything appeared to be just fine.
But while the "Wives" were choosing which vintage bathing suits to wear, an ABC employee (who Vanity Fair refers to as the "enabler) arrived saying, "I'm getting text messages from Eva. Everything is not fine."
Odd because, days later, Marcia told us there had been no bickering.
"No [there wasn't] because we all look good in different things," Cross said.
But as the photo shoot turned into a real-life soap opera, the end result may be that the women of Wisteria will probably never pose together again.
So what exactly happened?
"I would say Felicity Huffman and Nicolette Sheridan both were extremely consistently professional," Vanity Fair's Zeman noted. "Nobody really crossed the line except for Marcia Cross who really crossed the line and was humiliating people and generally making it difficult for everyone."
But the real drama began when, according to the magazine, the "enabler" whipped out a lost of "mandatory stipulations" singling out one lady in particular – 40-year-old co-star Teri Hatcher.
Stipulation #1: "Whatever you do, don't let Teri go to wardrobe first."
None of the other women wanted her to get to wardrobe first," Zeman continued. "I think they felt that Teri always shows up earlier and gets the best clothes so there was some anxiety praying that she'd not get there first which of course she did."
Stipulation #2: "Teri cannot be in the middle of a single group shot."
Apparently, in group shots, Teri was not to be in the middle of any of them. But there she was standing smack dab in the middle of Nicolette and Marcia.
And this is where nerves reportedly started to fray.
According to Zeman, when Cross saw that Hatcher was not only beside her in an eye-popping red suit, but right in the middle, the 43-year-old Cross exploded and walked off the set.
"Eventually Marcia Cross refused to stand next to her and started screaming to her publicist in this kind of profanity-laced tirade saying, 'Get over here and do your 'bleeping' job or you're going to be in 'bleeping' trouble,'" the Vanity Fair editor revealed.
After publicists exchanged heated words off-set, Marcia was moved to the other side of Teri, while Teri was asked to sit in a chair.
"I have never experienced anything like this in my entire life. I've never seen publicists essentially try to grab the camera away from a photographer. [But] I've never seen them use profanity and threaten people and I've never seen people cry and storm off like that," Zeman said.
By this point, Teri was looking very upset while Marcia started to joke around. But finally, the girls were in cover-shot position.
However, during a break Zeman claims that Hatcher burst into tears.
"I think Teri was upset for a number of reasons," he explained. "She is, out of all the women oddly, the most sensitive and maybe the most high-strung she cries easily and I think it was a big surprise to her that not only had a rule been laid down that she wasn't going to be in the center, but that one of her co-stars was that upset about it. I think it was a little humiliating to her."
Once the group shot was over, four of the five ladies began chatting. Teri, however, walked off by herself.
Tune into Tuesday's Access Hollywood for our exclusive sitdown with Teri Hatcher. We get the straight answers from the "Housewife" caught in the crossfire!