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Girls Aloud
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Girl's Aloud's Nicola Roberts on why she's pale and interesting
For years, Girls Alouder Nicola Roberts, 22, was so crippled with insecurity about her pale skin, she became a tanorexic.
She tells us how she learned to love herself: "When I was a growing up I never thought I was ugly. It wasn’t until I got into Girls Aloud and people started making horrible comments about my red hair and pale skin that I started to hate my looks. I felt like a total misfit in the band – the other girls were tanned and beautiful, and I was the ugly one. I felt like I shouldn’t be there."
The singer continue: "I tried to cover up my insecurities by turning into a big-time tanorexic. I had every single product from every range. It filled a whole shelf in my bathroom, and no matter how exhausted I was, I needed my fix. I’d come home at midnight from working with the band, jump in the shower to exfoliate, put fake tan on, and be lying in bed at half one in the morning thinking, 'Right, I’ve got to get up at half five. Oh please God, let this tan have developed by then'.
"None of those claims about fake tan not smelling or not streaking, are true. But I didn’t care, as long as I looked brown. When I first started seeing my boyfriend Carl [Davies] I was never worried about him seeing my panda eyes the next morning, just my pale body. One night I ended up staying over at his house unexpectedly and I hadn’t got any fake tan on. I was lying there with the duvet pulled up to my chin thinking, 'This poor sod’s going to jump out of bed thinking the moon has landed in his room in the middle of the night. I’ve got to get dressed without him seeing me.' I was freaking out.
AdvertisementShe tells us how she learned to love herself: "When I was a growing up I never thought I was ugly. It wasn’t until I got into Girls Aloud and people started making horrible comments about my red hair and pale skin that I started to hate my looks. I felt like a total misfit in the band – the other girls were tanned and beautiful, and I was the ugly one. I felt like I shouldn’t be there."
The singer continue: "I tried to cover up my insecurities by turning into a big-time tanorexic. I had every single product from every range. It filled a whole shelf in my bathroom, and no matter how exhausted I was, I needed my fix. I’d come home at midnight from working with the band, jump in the shower to exfoliate, put fake tan on, and be lying in bed at half one in the morning thinking, 'Right, I’ve got to get up at half five. Oh please God, let this tan have developed by then'.
"None of those claims about fake tan not smelling or not streaking, are true. But I didn’t care, as long as I looked brown. When I first started seeing my boyfriend Carl [Davies] I was never worried about him seeing my panda eyes the next morning, just my pale body. One night I ended up staying over at his house unexpectedly and I hadn’t got any fake tan on. I was lying there with the duvet pulled up to my chin thinking, 'This poor sod’s going to jump out of bed thinking the moon has landed in his room in the middle of the night. I’ve got to get dressed without him seeing me.' I was freaking out.
"Make-up artists would give me foundation that was four shades too dark, but I’d insist it was still too light. They must have hated me. Costumes would be wrecked. I’d wear a dress once and it would be filthy with fake tan. If I didn’t have any on I wouldn’t let people take my picture. Cheryl [Cole] would say to me, 'Nicola, you’re pale-skinned, you’re absolutely gorgeous, just be pale.' But I was adamant – I felt too ugly to be seen as I really was.
"Lying in the sun didn’t work – I’d just burn, then I’d peel and go whiter. I was always getting burnt. Five years ago I went on holiday with my first boyfriend to Majorca. I had my Factor 50 on and I fell asleep while he went off jet-skiing. He came back a couple of hours later and just said, 'Oh. My. God.' I was brick-coloured. My skin was so sore I couldn’t even lie in bed. I couldn’t do anything except cry from the pain. I probably should have gone to hospital. The next day I wrapped myself in wet towels and sat under a big brolly, hating myself as all these Spanish women walked past in their bikinis, tanned to perfection.
"Things started to change about a year ago. Last summer I was wearing body make-up on my legs for a bit of colour but it was so hot, it was melting. As we were getting out of the car, Carl looked down and said, 'Nicola, you can’t get out of the car like that, your legs are all streaky and your tan’s going everywhere. Why can’t you just be pale?' I shouted, 'You just don’t understand what it’s like for me being this pale. My legs look blue!'
"But after that I knew he didn’t find my skin unattractive and he thinks I look better being pale. So it made me feel more attractive. Everything started clicking into place. The fake tan went. I haven’t had any on since the V Festival last year. The first few weeks I’d come to work with a dress on saying, 'Look, I’ve got nothing on my legs!' The girls were great. They said I was like a different person.
"I don’t listen to the comments any more. There was a picture of me and Kimberley [Walsh] in the paper when we came back from Thailand recently. Kimberley looked so brown and I looked so white, the pair of us were howling with laughter over it. But I wasn’t bothered. I see myself looking like that every day and it’s not an issue. I know I’m this pale and I like it. When I put fake tan on it looked messy and I felt like a chav because it didn’t suit me. I was always really aware there weren’t any products for very pale women. I created my make-up range with Jelly Pong Pong to deal with that. It’s all about wearing colours that flatter pale skin, instead of caking it with fake tan and turning it into something it’s not.
"I was surprised to see how many women had the same issue as me. I read posts on websites: one person would say, “Nicola needs to put a bit of fake tan on,” but there’d be other women saying, 'Well, I’ve got red hair and it’s about time someone broke the mould.'
"There was an article recently with a picture of me at the launch wearing my make-up, saying that I’d 'taken the white look too far'. I was appalled. They’re saying I’m too white. What’s that about? It’s like having make-up for black women and someone saying, 'Oh I think they look too black.'
"I believe that old cliché that what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. But I’m aware of how long it took me to feel comfortable being this pale and I know that for young women, society can be quite cruel. I just hope it doesn’t take them as long as it took me to accept themselves...’
NICOLA’S BEAUTY MUST HAVES
I’ve discovered P20 Sun Cream, £12.95, and it’s great. I have to put it on 2-3 times a day (it says once and then you’re covered but I put it on 2 or 3 times to be safe). It’s better than putting Factor 50 on three times an hour.
I use Garnier Deep Pore Facial Wash, £3.99. I started using it years ago, then tried other things but my skin’s sensitive and I just get break-outs. It’s better to just stick to the same products and let my skin get used to it.
Elemis do a really nice Muscle Soak, £32. After rehearsals, Carl will run me a bath and put that in. I get home and I’m like, ‘Uh, uh, hot water, please’. When I
get out of the bath it’s a miracle – I’m not stiff any more.
I love TIGI S Factor shampoo £13.50, and conditioner, £14.50. You have GOT to get it. You wake up in the morning and your pillow smells like sweets.
My Dainty Doll Blush And Contour, £10, has a blusher and a shader to cheat that sculpted A-list look. I suck my cheeks in and then apply shader to the dark bit to give me instant cheekbones.
I like loads of mascara. Anything that is going to make my lashes long, long, long. MAC Zoom Lash, £10, is good.
NICOLA ON - SHARING WITH THE GIRLS ALOUDERS
When we’re on tour there’s always someone banging on the door yelling, ‘I need the toothpaste!’ ‘I need a razor!’ Nadine will come out with her hair tied up with a thong, and I’ll be like, ‘I’m not going to be in a band with you looking like that. Here’s a bobble.’
BEAUTY CREAMS
I see creams on the TV and think. ‘That’s rubbish’. That’s not going to give you a face lift. I’m not going to get baby skin from cream.
PLASTIC SURGERY
I would have it. But not now I’m going through this confident stage. I understand women who want their tummy taken in after kids. If you can fix it and it makes you feel secure, do it. It can destroy your marriage if you don’t want to get undressed in front of your husband. I hate my nose, I have it airbrushed in every picture, but I wouldn’t have an operation at the moment.
MAKE-UP
I used to watch the other girls doing their make up. When Kimberley was 21, I was 16. I’d watch how she put make-up on and think, ‘That’s a lovely colour.’ Then when I put it on my face, it was just too dark and stood out in the wrong way. I’ve learned less is more.
Dainty Doll by Nicola Roberts for Jelly Pong Pong is available at ASOS.com
"Lying in the sun didn’t work – I’d just burn, then I’d peel and go whiter. I was always getting burnt. Five years ago I went on holiday with my first boyfriend to Majorca. I had my Factor 50 on and I fell asleep while he went off jet-skiing. He came back a couple of hours later and just said, 'Oh. My. God.' I was brick-coloured. My skin was so sore I couldn’t even lie in bed. I couldn’t do anything except cry from the pain. I probably should have gone to hospital. The next day I wrapped myself in wet towels and sat under a big brolly, hating myself as all these Spanish women walked past in their bikinis, tanned to perfection.
"Things started to change about a year ago. Last summer I was wearing body make-up on my legs for a bit of colour but it was so hot, it was melting. As we were getting out of the car, Carl looked down and said, 'Nicola, you can’t get out of the car like that, your legs are all streaky and your tan’s going everywhere. Why can’t you just be pale?' I shouted, 'You just don’t understand what it’s like for me being this pale. My legs look blue!'
"But after that I knew he didn’t find my skin unattractive and he thinks I look better being pale. So it made me feel more attractive. Everything started clicking into place. The fake tan went. I haven’t had any on since the V Festival last year. The first few weeks I’d come to work with a dress on saying, 'Look, I’ve got nothing on my legs!' The girls were great. They said I was like a different person.
"I don’t listen to the comments any more. There was a picture of me and Kimberley [Walsh] in the paper when we came back from Thailand recently. Kimberley looked so brown and I looked so white, the pair of us were howling with laughter over it. But I wasn’t bothered. I see myself looking like that every day and it’s not an issue. I know I’m this pale and I like it. When I put fake tan on it looked messy and I felt like a chav because it didn’t suit me. I was always really aware there weren’t any products for very pale women. I created my make-up range with Jelly Pong Pong to deal with that. It’s all about wearing colours that flatter pale skin, instead of caking it with fake tan and turning it into something it’s not.
"I was surprised to see how many women had the same issue as me. I read posts on websites: one person would say, “Nicola needs to put a bit of fake tan on,” but there’d be other women saying, 'Well, I’ve got red hair and it’s about time someone broke the mould.'
"There was an article recently with a picture of me at the launch wearing my make-up, saying that I’d 'taken the white look too far'. I was appalled. They’re saying I’m too white. What’s that about? It’s like having make-up for black women and someone saying, 'Oh I think they look too black.'
"I believe that old cliché that what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. But I’m aware of how long it took me to feel comfortable being this pale and I know that for young women, society can be quite cruel. I just hope it doesn’t take them as long as it took me to accept themselves...’
NICOLA’S BEAUTY MUST HAVES
I’ve discovered P20 Sun Cream, £12.95, and it’s great. I have to put it on 2-3 times a day (it says once and then you’re covered but I put it on 2 or 3 times to be safe). It’s better than putting Factor 50 on three times an hour.
I use Garnier Deep Pore Facial Wash, £3.99. I started using it years ago, then tried other things but my skin’s sensitive and I just get break-outs. It’s better to just stick to the same products and let my skin get used to it.
Elemis do a really nice Muscle Soak, £32. After rehearsals, Carl will run me a bath and put that in. I get home and I’m like, ‘Uh, uh, hot water, please’. When I
get out of the bath it’s a miracle – I’m not stiff any more.
I love TIGI S Factor shampoo £13.50, and conditioner, £14.50. You have GOT to get it. You wake up in the morning and your pillow smells like sweets.
My Dainty Doll Blush And Contour, £10, has a blusher and a shader to cheat that sculpted A-list look. I suck my cheeks in and then apply shader to the dark bit to give me instant cheekbones.
I like loads of mascara. Anything that is going to make my lashes long, long, long. MAC Zoom Lash, £10, is good.
NICOLA ON - SHARING WITH THE GIRLS ALOUDERS
When we’re on tour there’s always someone banging on the door yelling, ‘I need the toothpaste!’ ‘I need a razor!’ Nadine will come out with her hair tied up with a thong, and I’ll be like, ‘I’m not going to be in a band with you looking like that. Here’s a bobble.’
BEAUTY CREAMS
I see creams on the TV and think. ‘That’s rubbish’. That’s not going to give you a face lift. I’m not going to get baby skin from cream.
PLASTIC SURGERY
I would have it. But not now I’m going through this confident stage. I understand women who want their tummy taken in after kids. If you can fix it and it makes you feel secure, do it. It can destroy your marriage if you don’t want to get undressed in front of your husband. I hate my nose, I have it airbrushed in every picture, but I wouldn’t have an operation at the moment.
MAKE-UP
I used to watch the other girls doing their make up. When Kimberley was 21, I was 16. I’d watch how she put make-up on and think, ‘That’s a lovely colour.’ Then when I put it on my face, it was just too dark and stood out in the wrong way. I’ve learned less is more.
Dainty Doll by Nicola Roberts for Jelly Pong Pong is available at ASOS.com
