Review by Maya Singer
September 8, 2014
style.com
FADE IN:
EXT. METROPOLITAN OPERA HOUSE—NIGHT
A crowd of FASHION TYPES piles out of the opera house, onto the plaza at Lincoln Center.
The EDITOR, a tall man, waits at the curb, tapping out a message on his phone.
After a moment, the REVIEWER exits. Black clad; the usual.
EDITOR
Well. What're you going to say about that?
REVIEWER
(shaking head)
Oh, man…
EDITOR
You planning on reviewing that play, or just the clothes?
The Reviewer spots a MODEL passing by, smoking a cigarette.
REVIEWER (cont'd)
(to Model)
Can I bum one of those?
MODEL
Uh—sure.
The Model fishes a cigarette out of her pack.
EDITOR
I thought you quit.
REVIEWER
I un-quit. Right now. This minute.
MODEL
Here—
The Model hands the Reviewer a cigarette and strides off.
EDITOR
I thought it was good. Jonah Hill's script was funny, Spike Jonze's direction was solid.
Might be his best work since Adaptation. Hard to get a read on the collection, though.
REVIEWER
Yeah, exactly.
EDITOR
Did you look at the clothes? Up close, I mean.
REVIEWER
For a second. It was crowded.
(beat)
I don't have a light.
She drags pointlessly on her unlit cigarette.
REVIEWER
(beat)
Was it really about the clothes, though? I mean—revolutionary thinking, it starts with,
like, realizing that things don't have to be the way they are, right?
The Editor rolls his eyes.
REVIEWER
So Humberto and Carol—the whole OC team—it's like, they've created this alternate
possibility for what a fashion show could be. It wasn't about the clothes, and it wasn't
about the play either, really. I mean—some good stuff, some terrific acting, fun little
industry in-jokes, but it wasn't, like, Shakespeare…
EDITOR
Shakespeare never had to design a shift dress.
REVIEWER
They said "f***ing" a lot. How many of those do you think were ad-libs?
EDITOR
I guess Jonah Hill learned something from working with Scorcese.
The Editor's phone PINGS.
EDITOR
The car's here—
REVIEWER
All I'm saying is—OK, you know the line in the play, when John Cameron Mitchell says—I
mean, "Humberto" says, "When did this stop being fun?" I think that's the point. Of all this.
Fun. Getting back to, like, taking chances. Doing something because you can, because why
not? Who says fashion shows have to be one way or another way? Break the form.
EDITOR
I see what you're getting at. But what did you think of the clothes?
REVIEWER
Good! Colorful. More straightforward than the last couple of seasons, which I appreciate…I
liked the shorts. I liked that kind of lurid orange color. I liked all the slit details, and the track
pants. I couldn't tell what any of the fabrics were. But, like, if OC can put on a "show" instead
of doing a show, maybe I write my review in, I don't know, sonnet form.
EDITOR
Iambic pentameter? Rhymed couplets? You're on deadline.
REVIEWER
Or a podcast. "This Fashion Life."
EDITOR
We've got to get to Versus.
He starts off, shaking his head. The Reviewer chucks her unlit cigarette and follows.
HOLD on them as they walk away.
DIALOGUE AUDIO FADES DOWN.
REVIEWER
Bobby Cannavale and Elle Fanning could be on it. I think there should be a law, they have to
be involved with all fashion things from now on.
EDITOR
Sure, I'd lobby for that.
REVIEWER
Where'd you get that Karlie Kookie?!
EDITOR
It's in the gift bag.
REVIEWER
Score.
FADE OUT.
THE END
...
