i'm 5'4", 40 kg and i carry large tote like balenciaga weekender, chanel original coco cabas for daily...
i think petite women can carry huge tote best.
but u have to consider the proportion of the big bag so it won't overwhelmed ur body
for instance, i have boyish body, that is no boobs and no ***, so i don't go with too wide bags because they will make me thinner from the side, i prefer the one that goes longer because i have shorter torso and longer leg, a tall bag looks better on me IMO.
and i also avoid sturdy structure large tote because it'll bulk on my skinny arm, i prefer the slouchy one so although it's big, it fits well on my body.