utopia, I know what you mean by this!
I read through this whole topic and am familiar with "the stare", but within the past year and a half or so most people I know don't have rude comments to make anymore, they actually have nice things to say, and the next time I see them they are trying to copy what I've worn!
I think the fact that I developed a whole lot more confidence in my clothes and myself in general has a lot to do with this.
HOWEVER, recently I saw the movie
The Notebook for the first time and for some reason fell absolutely in love with Allie's circa-1945ish clothes. She was supposed to be from a wealthy family, so her clothes just looked so gorgeous and luxe. I just thought they were beautiful, so I started hitting the vintage from the 1940's. I mean, nothing I wore looked completely costume-y or anything. I wore pieces that I loved from that time period, but still tried to keep it looking at least somewhat modern. I had a few comments, completely random people I was standing in front of in line at the store or a waitress at a restaurant asking me if I was heading to a re-enactment of WWII later or if I was in a play about the 1940's.
Whatever, I love the stuff, and a lot of people also asked me where I found my skirt, or blouse, and complimented me...
It just comes down to the old truth about a lot of prejudice and rude comments...if people aren't familiar with something, if it's not like them, they probably aren't going to like it. It's just human nature. They can't understand it and they don't know how to react. If you live in an area that seriously lacks any diversity in style (like I do), people are going to be confused and possibly mean. Who cares if you love your clothes though. At least you'll be memborable.