Today, The Rude Awakening, an investment newsletter I subscribe to, features this article on the correlation between Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issues and the perfomance of financial markets in the countries of origin of the respective models. I hope you'll find it entertaining.
THE BARE REALITIES
By Eric J. Fry
Is Argentinean supermodel Yamila Diaz-Rahi an investment
genius? The answer may surprise you...
Every winter, as arctic temperatures descend upon the
Northeast, Sports Illustrated contributes a welcome dose of
sunshine to our frigid landscape by releasing its infamous
"swimsuit issue." Each issue contains the usual tiresome
collection of impossibly beautiful women wearing - or not
wearing - exotic bikinis in exotic locales. To which your
editors respond, "Ho-hum."
For dispassionate financial types such as ourselves, for
whom scantily clad models are but so many inadequately
dressed Homo sapiens, the swimsuit issue nevertheless
offers a particular allure - investment guidance.
A few years back, your New York editor discovered an
improbable connection between the nationality of the model
appearing on each cover of the SI swimsuit issue and the
subsequent direction of share prices on the national stock
exchange of her home country.
As we noted in our initial report, "Economies go boom when
their native assets appear on the cover of Sports
Illustrated's swimsuit issue." And so do their stock
markets. After rigorous research, we concluded, "When a
bikini-clad supermodel is the first from her country to
grace the cover of Sports Illustrated, her appearance kicks
off a four-year bull run in the stock market of her native
land."
Is this indicator a mere fluke or a can't-miss barometer of
global investment trends? Let the reader decide.
In 2001, Sports Illustrated placed the beautiful and
talented Elsa Benitez on the cover of its swimsuit issue,
making her the first Mexican to claim the honor. Now that
the indicator has four years under its g-string, let's
check the results. Despite a very rough time for the stock
market here north of the border since the early days of
2001, the Mexican bolsa has doubled since Elsa adorned the
SI cover.
Sure, this strong performance might seem purely
coincidental. But facts are facts. Let's briefly review:
In 1978, Brazil's Maria Joao became the first foreign-born
supermodel to appear on the cover of SI's swimsuit issue.
Four years later, her country's Bovespa index had soared an
astounding 465%.
Throughout the early 1980s, American models like Christie
Brinkley and Cheryl Tiegs captured the coveted cover-photo
slots in the swimsuit editions. We all know what happened
next: U.S. stocks kicked off a mind-boggling 20-year bull
market. Next up, in 1986, the stunning Australian model,
Elle MacPherson, made her first of several cover
appearances. Over the ensuing four years, the Australian
Stock Exchange's 50 Leaders Index rose 75%.
The swimsuit edition continued to deliver eye-pleasing
results into the 1990s. In the very first year of this new
decade, the bonita Spanish senorita, Judit Masco, landed on
the Sports Illustrated cover. Four years later, Spain's
IBEX index had appreciated 21%. When the Swedish beauty
Vendela Kirsebom graced the cover of the magazine in 1993,
the OMX-Stockholm index rose to the occasion by
appreciating 161% over the next four years. "Kiwi model
Rachel Hunter might not have lasted with Rod Stewart," we
observed in our original report, "but her appearance on the
1994 cover kept SI's winning streak alive - barely. New
Zealand's Top 40 Index rose a mere 6% over the next four
years." Four years later, German "uber-model" Heidi Klum
adorned the swimsuit cover, which presaged an eye-pleasing
24% gain for the German Dax Index between 1998 and 2002.
Then, three years ago, Sports Illustrated gave the nod to
Argentina, birthplace of the stunning cover model, Yamila
Diaz-Rahi. We admit; we were skeptical. Argentina seemed a
very dicey investment proposition, given the country's
travails at the time. Fresh on the heels of a wrenching
currency devaluation and amidst mounting economic
difficulties, Argentina did not seem like a red-hot
investment destination. But Yamila's appearance in a
swimsuit consisting only of silver and jade argued
persuasively to the contrary.
"Riches await" seemed to be the message to intrepid
investors in Argentine stocks. And so far, the Argentinean
stock market has delivered on Yamila's implicit promise.
Four years have not yet elapsed, of course, since Yamila's
cover appearance. But so far, so good. Argentina's Merval
Index has already tripled since the beginning of 2002.
Perhaps these remarkably favorable results are no mere
accident. After all, as we noted in our original report,
"What better way to strike patriotic fervor and self-
confidence in the heart of a nation - and stimulate its
economy - than by splashing one of its bathing beauties on
the cover of Sports Illustrated? When the Czech supermodel
Paulina Porizkova first appeared in 1984, her native land
was in the grip of Communist rule and had no stock
exchange. Today, freedom rings in the Czech Republic and
its vibrant economy is the backbone of central Europe."
The parting of the iron curtain exposed the Czech
Republic's considerable indigenous assets - assets which
are now attracting acute interest from the West. In 2000,
Daniela Pestova became the first Czech to appear on the SI
cover since the Prague stock exchange opened for business.
Thus, for purposes of evaluating the indicator, we consider
her the "first" Czech to appear. The investment
consequences did not disappoint. Four years after Pestova's
appearance, the Prague PX50 Index had advanced 36% - a
remarkable feat considering the fact that most other world
markets fell during the same time-frame.
Pestova's Czech comrades, Petra Nemcova and Veronica
Varekova, claimed the SI covers for the homeland in 2003
and 2004 respectively. The PX50 has more than doubled since
Nemcova's appearance and has registered a small advance
since Varekova graced the cover. Thus, the indicator
performed marvelously once again. But the barrage of Czech
cover models since 2000 may be indicating that its time to
look for opportunity elsewhere.
Might the SI swimsuit issue contain the secrets to other
financial markets as well? Does the location of the photo
shoots, for example, foretell the direction of interest
rates? Or does the ratio of semi-nude photos relative to
all other photos expose valuable insights about hard
assets...like gold, steel or crude oil?
Unfortunately, we have not yet unlocked all of the
mysteries that the SI swimsuit issue may contain. But rest
assured, your resolute and indefatigable New York editor
will continue his tireless research on behalf of all Rude
Awakening readers.
Which foreign bourse or bolsa should the philogynistic
global investor now consider? We breathlessly await the
answer from the upcoming 2005 swimsuit issue.
... Can't stand her ugly EVERYTHING....
(I'm so sorry her career has sort of fizzled 
) on the cover of Dec. 2002 US GLAMOUR - my own scan:
- even with her clothes on - Yamila - Spring Fashion 2000 VSC - my own scans:
