I don't understand the amount of hated for summer. She is very much a secondary character. She hasn’t been flushed out enough. This is a story very much about Tom and his need for love. The character of Summer was honest as she could have been with him and herself. She told him about being causal, not being his girlfriend and not promising him the security of knowing her feelings for him won’t change. I really like her honesty. He is the one that chose to not listen to her and not stand by his beliefs. Tom wanted more from Summer and she was starting to resent that. I think that was one of the reasons why she was hot and cold towards the end. Tom didn’t even realize they were fighting. And for her to say she was Sid. Says to me that she ended it before she could hate him.
If Summer was using Tom. Then I think Tom was using Summer too. TO prove to himself that love was there and Summer was the one. If Summer was jaded from her parents splitting up. Then Tom had a one sided view of what love is. From listening to British music and misinterpretation of the Graduate. Tom very much lives in his own head. He was using Summer to escape his boring and routine life. He thought that if he found the one, his life would some how be magically different. That can be very exhausting and time consuming. To pin all of your dreams into one girl. That is too much for Summer or any girl to live up to.
If you look closely Summer was really supportive of Tom. She wanted to know more about him as an architect, she would ask him about his dreams, letting him draw on her, and telling her friends what a great architect he could be.
What Tom learned was to go out and experience life. If you want the job, go and get it. If you want the girl, go and ask her out. He spent weeks staring, and stalking Summer. He took less than 5 minutes to ask Autumn out. Tom changed so much. And he wouldn't have met Autumn if he didn't quit his job.