
Squinty Zellweger not only resembles a lemon-sucking blonde version of Liza Minnelli, but apparently she's got the same thirst for (allegedly) gay husbands. See Kenny Chesney.
Page Six seems to think that Squinty is planning on marrying her Bradley Cooper, because she went wedding dress shopping at Carolina Herrera in West Hollywood last week. A witness type said that she looked at dresses for nearly two hours, and coyly smiled whenever someone asked her if she was getting hitched. Squints left with a garment bag in hand.
Squints is going for some kind of professional *** hag record! Maybe she actually likes spending her wedding night nibbling on a piece of cake in the corner of her suite while listening to her new husband sloppily eating another dude's as* in the next room? Or maybe she just likes weddings. And the best way to party at a wedding is to do it next to a gay!
While a straight man might roll his eyes or let out a mouth fart when they release the white doves into the sky, a gay's heart will flutters right next to yours. And while a straight dude might not give a fuc* what you look like during the reception as long your as* puts out that night, a gay will make sure you look like elegant perfection from top to bottom at all times! So I get it, Squints. I get it.
Here's B.Coop and his Pledge-scented beard going to lunch with their parents in NYC yesterday.
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