Madonna to Adopt a baby

[KhaoticKharma]

forget Madonna...i want Oprah to adopt me. Not foster parent...adopt! I wonder if i have to move to Malawi for her to do it...

Me too!

 

[taperjeangirl]

*having a loving mother and father with nothing outweighs having everything*

I wish more people felt the same way

 

[Anastasia]

I totally get where you're coming from. No need to apologize. And I didn't mean for it sound like that at all. I just think the standards of being "poor" here in America, Europe, etc is wildly diffrent when it comes to the people of Africa. As I stated before, my parents were both poor Nigerians growing. Both my parents had 6/7 brothers and sisters. My family was considered lower class, until my father went back to school at the age of 40 years old 8 years ago. My parents are constantly wiring relatives back home money. When they do travel to Nigeria, their suitcases are chalk full of things to take to relatives.Beleive me I know, what it's like.

I, personally don't look at David's father as this poor minority. Just because people are struggling dosen't mean they should give up their children. But when they are at a point where the child is living in an orphanage, than perhaps things should be considered, that's all I'm saying.

I didn't mean to downplay your situation or anyone in a similar situation.

Peace Your family's strength sounds inspiring. And I agree that even "dirt poor" in America is still a world above African poor.

And I actually agree totally with your statement here about David's father. I'm usually very pro-adoption. My take on the situation though is that he didn't understand what was going on, and had intended to take the child back from the orphanage/viewed it as temporary. I got the impression that perhaps our American definition of an orphanage was different from how they viewed it in the village. I've never heard of an orphanage situation here (do we even still have "orphanages"? I don't think so) where the living parent visits every day, and talks about bringing the child home when the situation improves.

It's an emotional subject for me, because of my past, and because of current issues with disability, and the droves of people who want to define my quality of life for me. While not the same issue, they do twine together. I apologize again, what I said to you was unnecessary - it'll teach me not to post before the vicodin kicks in

 

[Jadee]

Madonna: The Adoption Controversy (from Oprah.com)

From provocative videos to headline-making risqué concerts, Madonna is known for pushing people's buttons. Now it's her actions off stage that are putting her back in the center of controversy.

In the fall of 2006, Madonna traveled to the African nation of Malawi where she is building an orphan care center with her foundation Raising Malawi. Soon after her trip, news broke that she and husband, Guy Ritchie, were adopting a 13-month-old boy named David.

Local human rights groups have since gone to court, challenging the Malawian government's decision to allow Madonna to adopt David. They believe that Madonna used her wealth and celebrity to fast track the adoption. News outlets have also recently reported that David's birth father, whom originally was in support of the adoption, claims to not have fully understood what he was saying when he encouraged the adoption.

Madonna, accustomed to being criticized in the media, says she never expected to be criticized for her family's choice to adopt a son.

"I didn't realize that the adoption was causing any controversy until I came back," she says. "There were a million film crews in the airport and press camped outside my door. I don't read newspapers or watch television, but all of my friends have let me know what everybody's talking about and what's going on in the news. So it didn't really hit me until I got back to England. It's pretty shocking."

Does celebrity affect the adoption process?

Madonna and Guy Ritchie have been granted an "interim adoption" by the Malawian government—David will live in their care for an initial 18 months while a London-based social worker will visit them periodically to ensure David is being cared for and not neglected. After the 18 months, Madonna and Guy may then legally adopt David.

Madonna says that her critics don't really understand how the Malawian adoption process works if they believe she used status to speed up the process of adopting David. "I assure you it doesn't matter who you are or how much money you have, nothing goes fast in Africa," Madonna says. "There are no adoption laws in Malawi. And I was warned by my social worker that because there were no known laws in Malawi, they were more or less going to have to make them up as we went along. And she did say to me, 'Pick Ethiopia. Go to Kenya. Don't go to Malawi because you're just going to get a hard time.'"



The state of baby David's health

Madonna says that she and Guy had planned on adopting a child two years ago, not knowing where they would adopt. It was her ongoing philanthropic work in Malawi that finally brought the Ritchies to David.

"I'm financing a documentary about orphans in Malawi, so I was allowed to view footage and photographs of a lot of the children. An 8-year-old girl who is living with HIV was holding this child. I became transfixed by him. … But I didn't yet know I was going to adopt him. I was just drawn to him."

David had spent most of his life in an orphanage with 500 other orphans. Madonna didn't know the state of David's health when she was visiting Malawi and considering adopting David. She brought a pediatrician to test all of the children's health for their overall well being, and later learned that David tested negative for tuberculosis, malaria, HIV and other common illnesses striking African orphans.

"When I met him, he was extremely ill," Madonna says. "He had severe pneumonia, and he could hardly breathe. I was in a state of panic, because I didn't want to leave him in the orphanage because I knew they didn't have medication to take care of him. We got permission to take him to a clinic to have a bronchial dilator put on him. … He had pneumonia and was given an injection of antibiotics. He's still a little bit ill, not completely free of his pneumonia, but he's much better than he was when we found him."

At home with Lourdes and Rocco

Madonna and Guy now have David with them at their home in London, along with their two other children, Lourdes and Rocco. Madonna said the children are in complete love with their new baby brother.

"They just embraced him, and that's the amazing thing about children," she says. "They don't ask questions. They've never once said, 'What is he doing here', or mentioned the difference in his skin color, or questioned his presence in our life. That is an amazing lesson that children do teach us."

Madonna addresses David's biological father's recent comments.

When Madonna first arrived in Malawi, she says she didn't know anything about David's parents. She was soon told that his mother had died of HIV and that his three siblings had also died of HIV. At the time, the Minister of Children and Mothers Welfare told Madonna that even though David's biological father's whereabouts were unknown, they would have to find him to give consent for the adoption.

"Here's what I knew. David had been living in this orphanage since he was two weeks old," Madonna says. "He had survived malaria and tuberculosis, and no one from his extended family had visited him since the time he arrived. So from my perspective, there was no one looking after David's welfare."

Once David's father was located, he initially said he gave his son up for adoption always hoping that someone like Madonna would be able to give him a better life, and agreed to the adoption. Now, according to the press, David's father is saying he did not fully understand what he was doing when he agreed to let Madonna adopt his son.

"I do not believe that is true. I sat in that room, I looked into that man's eyes," Madonna says. "I believe that the press is manipulating this information out of him. I believe at this point in time, he's been terrorized by the media. They have asked him things, repeatedly, and they have put words in his mouth. They have spun a story that is completely false."

Media influence on international adoption

With all the speculation, rumors and overall controversy surrounding Madonna's adoption of David, how does Madonna feel about the media?

"I wouldn't say I'm hurt by it, but I would say I'm disappointed," she says. "I understand that gossip and telling negative stories sells newspapers. But I think for me, I'm disappointed because it discourages other people from doing the same thing—for anybody who had the idea that they, too, would like to open their home and give a life to a child living in an orphanage who might possibly not live past the age of 5. Anybody who had that idea would be discouraged from doing it. For me, that's what disappoints me the most. I feel like the media is doing a great disservice to all the orphans of Africa, period, not just Malawi, by turning it into such a negative thing.

"I beg all of those people to go to Africa and see what I saw and walk through those villages. … To see 8-year-olds in charge of households. To see mothers dying, with Kaposi sarcoma lesions all over their bodies. To see open sewages everywhere. To see what I saw. It is a state of emergency. As far as I'm concerned, the adoption laws have to be changed to suit that state of emergency. I think if everybody went there, they'd want to bring one of those children home with them and give them a better life."

Oprah.com

I don't know what to think anymore

We've been fed so much lies since the beginning that we can't tell who's lying or not what the law says ect... what a mess. Poor poor child.

 

[mellowdrama]

"I do not believe that is true. I sat in that room, I looked into that man's eyes," Madonna says. "I believe that the press is manipulating this information out of him. I believe at this point in time, he's been terrorized by the media. They have asked him things, repeatedly, and they have put words in his mouth. They have spun a story that is completely false."

Looking directly into someone's eyes when we don't speak the same language is how I clearly communicate with people. Then I share a glass of water with them---we grok it Heinlein style! Next, we do a group native dance in front of a video crew, and he signs his "X" on the dotted line. Finally, I take everything that's his that he could possibly ever value. Then I look into the limpid pools of his eyes and I grok to him, "Non-attachment. Om Shanti. Over and out."

 

[Jadee]

Looking directly into someone's eyes when we don't speak the same language is how I clearly communicate with people. Then I share a glass of water with them---we grok it Heinlein style! Next, we do a group native dance in front of a video crew, and he signs his "X" on the dotted line. Finally, I take everything that's his that he could possibly ever value. Then I look into the limpid pools of his eyes and I grok to him, "Non-attachment. Om Shanti. Over and out."

David and Guy Ritchie.

oprah.com

 

[mellowdrama]

^That is one gorgeous, happy baby. I'm sure he'll live a good life. Money and blessings and the gates of heaven opened. Heck, through all this I've been inspired even to buy one of those Gap (Red) T-shirts (no foolin'. And I don't know where rent is coming from for November). I still won't buy a TV.

I still am leery of the Kabbalah Center. I suppose "Spirituality For Kids" could be argued to be a better option than either evangelicalism or sharia, but I honestly don't believe in the validity of "Everything happens for a reason", "Life is fair", or "You reap what you sow", especially in the face of a suffering innocents. Which is why I plugged the ancient (1981) Rabbi Kushner book.

Like Nixon said, "[SIZE=-1]‘People react to fear, not love. They don’t teach that in Sunday School, but it’s true." [/SIZE]Life is not fair. Things do not always happen for a reason. This is earth, not heaven. Power exercised--overtly or otherwise--is really helped along by happy, compliant, well-fed people with just the right edge of abbatoir fear. I understand Job and Ecclesiastes aren't the best kiddie books in the Bible. I applaud sunshine and lollipops and rainbows and everything. I like pictures of happy babies.

I still think a trend of Third World adoptions may lift the living standard of one child at a time, but it seems very much like Step 3 or 4 of "Genocide:Africa" which has been going on since colonial days. I do not doubt that Madonna has a loving heart; I still think she's a control freak who'll hopefully gracefully surrender alot more than the things of youth.

Well, I hope that for all of us really.

Malawi is a beautiful country with a very big freshwater lake which I'm sure will have a St. Regis next to it and another George Clooney villa one of these years. We've just got to find a way to entertain the Africans and convince the World Bank and IMF of the creditworthiness of the livelier ones who are easier to hook and hard to land. Meanwhile, we must maximize profits and compassion for the ones we've got to throw back or hospice into God's merciful life-extending protease-inhibiting hands. We'll need to give them a reason beyond animistic/Christian syncretism. In the words of the immortal Alvin and the Chipmunks:


You been keeping love from me just like you were a miser
And I'll admit I wasn't very smart
So I went out to find myself a guy that's so much wiser
And he taught me the way to win your heart

My friend the witchdoctor, he taught me what to say
My friend the witchdoctor, he taught me what to do
I know that you'll be mine when I say this to you


Ooh, eee, ooo, ahh ahh...Whether that is a good or bad thing, I really cannot say. Tis' all shades of relative grey. Let's get back on this sensible topic with a Latin mass, no?

 

[zembla]

Oprah has spoken and she is behind Madonna which means now the press is..lol...that woman is powerful

 

[KhaoticKharma]

I wish more people felt the same way

The thing is, if Madonna was willing to adopt this baby, she obviously loves the child- even if she's doing it for some degree of publicity, everyone knows it takes a lot of love and patience to deal with the ups and down of raising a child.

But lets be honest... this man's wife and other children died of malaria, and the baby was in an orphanage- he obviously wasn't into raising the child himself until there was publicity involved. If the baby is raised in Africa, he will suffer a life of poverty, disease, and in all honesty there would be no way out. In England he will be afforded the world's best education, two parents, and unlimeted opportunity. I would feel this way if any middle class/upper middle class couple from a first world country was looking to adopt an African baby.

All I know is that every GOOD PARENT that I've ever met has wanted what is best for their child, even if it isn't with them.

My stepsisters' mother was a crackhead who 'loved' her children- should they have stayed with her instead of their stable, hard working father because she "loved" them?

 

[mellowdrama]

http://www.pugbus.net/artman/publish/10252006_11_freekids.shtml

Lovely.

 

[kimair]

blood is thicker than water.

And like i said before taking a child when he/she still has a living parent/s and family creates legal mess, financial mess and emotional mess. Unfortunately this one came before the adoption was even finalized.

that is completely insane logic...
for whatever reason, my birth mother/parents could not raise me and i was adopted by my parents when i was 6 months old from an orphanage...
as far as i know, my birth mother is still alive and she has made no attempts to contact me or find out who/where i am...
mundodabolsa was exactly right in saying, why should children with birth parents who are still alive sit and wait to be adopted?
under your logic, i would have stayed in that orphanage until i turned 18...

i have to applaud madonna for choosing to adopt a child, when she already has two children of her own...
i also believe that david's father probably did not understand all that was happening and how much of a media circus it would become, not knowing who madonna was...
what troubles me is that david was in the hospital, extremely ill, and that his father hadn't gone to see him to check on his condition since he arrived there?

 

[Zen]

#166 that kid is super adorable! I hope things work.....

 

[smartarse]

you obviously didn't read all my posts as to why i made that comment...

prior to that, posts #102, #111, #114, #117 lead to my posts #147 that you refute which on post #150 and #156 explains why.

i'm not saying just because a child still has living relatives elsewhere he/she shouldnt get adopted. that's redundant. i'm only stressing that the birth parent/s should sever ties legally all together with the child before placing in an orphanage (perhaps, what your birth mother did with you) regardless what country. but in the Malawian Case the father asked the orphanage to help him raise his son for he cannot physically and monetarily do it. but then the Malawian Government dont have such laws for adoption. and according to the recent news he did not asked to give up the custody of his son. my only qualms about madonna, she knows there's still a father and a reason to bring his son to the orphanage. According to the father David is still his son while he goes looking for a job as a farmer from town to town and will only visit when he possibly can...whereas your birth mother didn't do with you. Madonna's intention is good. but in a way it's selfish. An American Journalist and Today's co-host, Meredith Vieira made an excellent point when she said along the lines of..... "Madonna should've given money to the father to help bring back his son and not take David from him to make him her own when there are alot of orphans that needed more but has no one".

...and with that i cannot take a child from his/her birth parents when their intentions was never to give them up in the first place... so i can make him/her my own. I'd rather give money to the orphanage and help built new facility, health care and food if I was so takened by A David. I would've done what Angelina Jolie, Mia Farrow, Meg Ryan did , adopt an orphan.

that is completely insane logic...
for whatever reason, my birth mother/parents could not raise me and i was adopted by my parents when i was 6 months old from an orphanage...
as far as i know, my birth mother is still alive and she has made no attempts to contact me or find out who/where i am...
mundodabolsa was exactly right in saying, why should children with birth parents who are still alive sit and wait to be adopted?
under your logic, i would have stayed in that orphanage until i turned 18...

i have to applaud madonna for choosing to adopt a child, when she already has two children of her own...
i also believe that david's father probably did not understand all that was happening and how much of a media circus it would become, not knowing who madonna was...
what troubles me is that david was in the hospital, extremely ill, and that his father hadn't gone to see him to check on his condition since he arrived there?

 

[La Bellabello]

have this been posted yet?
source:aftonbladet.se

 

[ultramarine]

I saw the Madge interview on Oprah and actually she did changed my mind ... I thought publicity stunt all the way til I heard her side of the story ... this shud be inspiring for other people to do something ... anything!

 

[eternitygoddess]

Yeah yeah yeah, next thing you know, everyone's adopting kids from Africa.

Why don't they adopt kids from America? There's tons of children in need of parents here. But nooooooooo Africa is the hot, 'it' place of the moment.

 

[mellowdrama]

Yeah yeah yeah, next thing you know, everyone's adopting kids from Africa.

Why don't they adopt kids from America? There's tons of children in need of parents here. But nooooooooo Africa is the hot, 'it' place of the moment.

The Great Lakes region of East Africa would be pre-eminently developable if it weren't for all the poor Africans there. They have a very temperate climate, good soil, and a lot of fresh water. However, we need to uplift them with Spirituality for Kids before sharia arrives---and let's not focus on the problems of Americans, especially not poor African Americans. We've already sold out their youth with false heroes and deathly pop culture. Let's be sure to remind them they're not as miserable as the real Africa Africans are. I'm talking about those threadbare little boys on the train who sell candy and are raising money for their "basketball camps". They aren't needy. Hunter's Point is a paradise, a Superfund--er, Super Fun!-- paradise.

So let's all take an African child into our hearts and homes so we can clear those acres out and start building the dream ranches for the megawealthy. They need a home on every continent because they're still not sure which is going to be the safe one when all hungry mob, holy war hell breaks loose. 'Cos you know we deserve it.

I really, really hope I'm wrong.

 

[Jadee]

#174 Rocco looks like Dewee from Malcom in the middle.

 

[KhaoticKharma]

Yeah yeah yeah, next thing you know, everyone's adopting kids from Africa.

Why don't they adopt kids from America? There's tons of children in need of parents here. But nooooooooo Africa is the hot, 'it' place of the moment.

Because, to most people, American children don't need it. They are in the system, but they're also in the best country in the world. They can still grow up to be somebody, because 'everyone' can grow up to be a somebody. African, Asian, and Easter European children are not awarded those opportunities.

 

[NOAR]

THe thing i don't understand is why to adopt a child who has parents, relatives? Is it easier?
Don't AJ children have parents too?