What to wear for a business dinner

[helena]

Ok you need to help me out. I have a big relatively important dinner that I have to got to on friday night as a guest of a Bank. The 'brief' is that I want to look attractive but I need to be taken seriously & it is important that I don't feel like i am being letched at by the macho bankers (I am the only female at a table of 12). I want to look modern but not fashion-y. I have a few options:

1. black halter neck dress with a drop waist & a white pattern on it - bought it for a dinner last year - haven't worn it since. I really wouldn't have bought it other than out of desparation. It fits the brief though. boringly ordinary.

2. black strapless dress made of a matt nylon stuff - I think its too edgy.

3. black chiffon dress with a v. neck & pink & red hearts on it. Reminiscent of moschino. Its nice - a fit frilly perhaps.

4. black helmut lang tux trousers & purple prada blouse with black velvet jacket. This would be ideal were it not that I wore it to the last two dinners I have been at when most of the bank were there too.

5. something new??????????

These things are so hard. The last one I was at one of the girls at the competitive firm was wearing a strappy fuschia pink number (gross) but all the guys were all over her checking out her cleavage (whicj is luch more ample than mine). This, of course, I don't think is a very good way to do business but....that seems to be the way that male dominated business works. You see my dillema? There will also be huge pressure to get completely drunk. As I'm by no means a big drinker I'm going to really struggle.


Any advice/thoughts would be most appreciated.

 

[princess_tess]

Why don't you wear a really sexy fitted suit? Like a white one or pinstripe? With something pretty underneath to give it that feminine feel...

 

[helena]

mmm a suit is probably not going to look right. I think it either has to be a dress or the tux trousers with something. s'pose I don't really want to look really sexy though. Sexy is not really my thing.I don't own a really sexy tight suit anyway.... I need to put on my thinking cap.

 

[princess_tess]

I say option 4 then... sounds good

 

[helena]

thanks princess tess - I might go out at lunchtime today to see if I can find a top that might work with the trousers - I recently saw a nice Joseph one that would work.

 

[princess_tess]

Thats alrite... maybe u could just mix and match...
and don't feel pressured to drink if u don't want to... if getting drunk appeals to them then they aren't worth stressing over too much

 

[helena]

I know, thats exactly what I think but its different in the kind of super alpha male environment that I work in. They make JR Ewing look like a pussycat. In that environment the attitude is that if you don't drink you are a loser!

 

[Alejandro]

Why don't you wear that black dress with heart print, with the black velvet blazer over it?

 

[helena]

yes i'll try it on & see what its like. its a lovely dress - whimsial rather than serious business....

thanks alejandro

 

[softgrey]

ummm...i don't think pink hearts say 'take me serious in business'...
and neither does a strapless number...

the tux pants sound like the best option...but if you've done that already...then a simple black dress would be the way to go...at first i thought a hlater dress would be too revealing, but maybe it's the best option...do you have a cute jacket you could put over that one...and then take off at the table...

the 'reveal' is always an attention getter...when you remove the jacket and sit down...gives the illusion of a strip tease and gets everyone's attention in a clever and subtle way...

you do have to be 'one of the guys'...but you don't have to drink like a fish to do it...as long as you have fun and joke along with everyone...you can even pretend to be more drunk than you are if it makes them feel better about being wasted... just lauugh a lot...that always works...men love women who laugh and smile alot... and they don't even know why... they just automatically do...

so i think the key is attractive and womanly...not sweet and little girly...
hope it helps...that's how i wouuld advise a client...

 

[helena]

Originally posted by softgrey@Sep 27 2004, 10:53 AM
ummm...i don't think pink hearts say 'take me serious in business'...
and neither does a strapless number...

the tux pants sound like the best option...but if you've done that already...then a simple black dress would be the way to go...at first i thought a hlater dress would be too revealing, but maybe it's the best option...do you have a cute jacket you could put over that one...and then take off at the table...

the 'reveal' is always an attention getter...when you remove the jacket and sit down...gives the illusion of a strip tease and gets everyone's attention in a clever and subtle way...

you do have to be 'one of the guys'...but you don't have to drink like a fish to do it...as long as you have fun and joke along with everyone...you can even pretend to be more drunk than you are if it makes them feel better about being wasted... just lauugh a lot...that always works...men love women who laugh and smile alot... and they don't even know why... they just automatically do...

so i think the key is attractive and womanly...not sweet and little girly...
hope it helps...that's how i wouuld advise a client...

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oh thanks - I can see you understand perfectly the situation I am in. Its sh*t & I hate it but I have to do it. You are right about the drinking - I will just pretend... I'll have to practise all week at laughing at crap jokes & cheesy lines. 'ha ha ha you're sooooo funny' (puke).

Ok I'll try on the halterneck tonight... its kind of womanly - less gamine which is my natural tendancy i suppose. I have a black satin jacket that I could perhaps wear. its padded & has a mandarin collar. quite nice.

thanks.xx

 

[softgrey]

padded and mandarin sounds perfect...a little padding as armour is a good trick...and men like the mandarin collar...fulfills some sort of geisha fantasy they all seem to have...

it's funny...if you think about it...they're pretty predictible...so they're actually pretty easy to manipulate and control in that situation... you'll be fine...!!!

 

[helena]

yip indeedy. last dinner i was at I got freaked as I met an ex bf who I hadn't seen for ten yrs and he was being inappropriate towards me. it was awkward.

 

[softgrey]

sounds awkward... ...eeps...!!!

you just gotta laugh it off...i really think that's the best way to handle those things in a graceful way...the only alternative i know is to be the b*tch...and that really gets you nowhere fast...

 

[helena]

Originally posted by softgrey@Sep 27 2004, 11:24 AM
sounds awkward... ...eeps...!!!

you just gotta laugh it off...i really think that's the best way to handle those things in a graceful way...the only alternative i know is to be the b*tch...and that really gets you nowhere fast...

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I'm afraid the 'graceful' way alluded me - my first comment to him was ' i hear you are onto wife number two'. Oh dear - that wasn't so good. I think I took the complete b*tch option in that scenario....

 

[softgrey]

hahaha...that's funny...

 

[helena]

bought a new joseph top yesterday for this - its black & white with spaghetti straps & has a velvet & sequined flower on the left side. its got tiers of fabric all the way round it. its lovely. i am going to waer it with the tux trousers & black satin jacket. I think that will do the trick. It will be nice to waer at other times too. can't weat a bra with it so will just keep my jacket on I think. thanks for the help. xx

 

[Hanne]

Hi Helena

I asked my husband who used to work in the City, which of your options he thought would work best given your objective..and he agreed with the look you went for on the two previous occassions you went out with the bank.
The second alternative he thought would work was the halterneck dress.

 

[softgrey]

Originally posted by helena@Sep 29 2004, 05:01 AM
bought a new joseph top yesterday for this - its black & white with spaghetti straps & has a velvet & sequined flower on the left side. its got tiers of fabric all the way round it. its lovely. i am going to waer it with the tux trousers & black satin jacket. I think that will do the trick. It will be nice to waer at other times too. can't weat a bra with it so will just keep my jacket on I think. thanks for the help. xx

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can you wear a jacket over the flower...doesn't it look odd?...

 

[tealady]

Originally posted by helena@Sep 27 2004, 06:00 AM
4. black helmut lang tux trousers & purple prada blouse with black velvet jacket. This would be ideal were it not that I wore it to the last two dinners I have been at when most of the bank were there too.

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Can you remember what the other persons wore at the last two dinners? If not, they probably can't remember what you wore either. And if what you wore was chic and ideal, I think you can wear it again and again. Just FYI.